I continue to work on catching myself in offering up my opinion about something before I am asked for it or before I ask permission to give it. This was a good lesson in my coach training; let the client work through and decide based on what is best for them and hold back on my opinion unless they clearly ask for it. This is a big distinction from consulting where the client is paying you for your opinion as the expert. Then it is up the client to decide if they act on the consultant’s expert opinion.
On the road to success, both knowing which opinions to listen to and which to discard and knowing when to keep your opinion to yourself are valuable skills. Recently I listened to Napoleon Hill’s audio CD set, “The Science of Personal Achievement.” He suggests a great response to people when they share their opinion, “What is that based upon?” If they have no factual basis or supporting data then it may be an opinion you discard quickly and keep moving forward. He also suggests asking yourself this question before you open your mouth to share.
JK Rowling was rejected by multiple publishing houses whose opinions were that “Harry Potter” would not sell. Thankfully she did not listen and kept submitting her book. Unfortunately many talented people without the courage to ignore opinions and the tenacity to keep going get stopped by these opinions before reaching their big destinations.
Of course, it is important to gather opinions and feedback to understand different perspectives and assure you are on the right track; just be discerning about whom you ask and those who offer unsolicited advice. And start to notice when you offer your own wisdom to share and what it is based upon; especially if it is with a young or vulnerable mind.
A little background on Napoleon Hill (click on the link to read more): in 1908 he was given a challenge by Andrew Carnegie to spend the next twenty years researching and documenting the secrets of the most successful people at the time. His resulting book, “Think & Grow Rich” was a huge success and continues to be read today long after it’s initial publication in 1937; he is often credited for starting the self-help industry and his life is an amazing “rags to riches” story too.
How do you gather and discern the opinions you listen to? This is a sincere request for you to share your opinion in a comment!
photo credit: LaughingSquid