internalGPS® Coach: Finding Your Daring Way In Tumultuous Times 1

It is a challenging time in our US political space; how do you stay centered and courageous in the midst of (this or other) turmoil? I often think of Steven Covey’s “circles of influence, concern” that I learned about decades ago. It gives me a way to let go of the frustration/anxiety with things that are out of my span of influence and re-focus on those things that I can influence or control, like voting.

Here are some other resources that help me continue to find my daring way and I hope they help you:

• Empathy – Listening with empathy, especially if you disagree. Dr. Brene Brown’s research gives these attributes of practicing empathy and she emphasizes that it is a practice (meaning: doing it, messing up, doing it again): 1. Perspective taking: Take their perspective, reflecting back your understanding of their view, not reiterating my own views, 2. Stay out of judgment: this can be challenging if you think their view is wrong or a polar opposite of yours, 3. Recognize their emotion: notice what they are feeling, 4. Communicate emotion: Reflect back with your own feelings (“It is challenging/frustrating/painful”) 5. Mindfulness: Stay in the present moment with full attention to the feelings that are arising and not going to the past or future.
• Do something helpful for someone else. Last week I had some turmoil swirling around in my head and it all went away when I focused on helping a friend with a challenge. I felt refreshed and at peace. Positive psychology research has scientifically shown how acts of kindness, generosity or support of others rewire your brain. And I love how the Dalai Lama and Arthur Brooks articulate this in this NY Times editorial.
• Ask for what you need. And for me, and for many of you I suspect, it is easier to offer support rather than ask for it. It can be as simple as asking a friend to take a break from bringing up the political challenges in discussions for a while. I asked him to talk to his other friends about it as it just wasn’t helpful for me to rehash the same issues again and it was bringing me down.

How do you continue to courageously find your way in the midst of turmoil? I’d love your insights in a comment here!